It has been at least 9 years since I have thought to put my innermosts to print. You know what I miss with online posting, obsessing about which type of book to use as a journal. I love buying office supplies and journal sections in bookstores keep me highly entertained. I guess you can not shake the love of school shopping and fond memories of the cheap little red cardboard diaries with the huge lock and dual keys that every little girl would receive for the first 10 years of her life. So here I am though, updating.
I started this journal in hopes that I could accomplish some of my goals with the thought that I can keep myself focused. Since I am the only married woman I know without children, this leaves me a lot of time to obsess about me. Which is surprisingly fun. Currently what I am obsessing about is finishing a marathon this year, and picking the Spanish language back up. Of course my husband and I have all the big financial goals: pay off the credit cards, travel more, save money. blah blah blah. But since this is my journal I am going to just focus on my little delights.
The marathon. I started out only running to be thin. Well now that I have learned to love myself a little more I realize that I am not really fat (okay I said a little more, so I would always love to lose more weight). So with self-acceptance comes another problem, motivation. Why keep running, what am I doing out there if there is no longer the dread, fear, and self-loathing to keep my feet pounding the pavement. That is where the marathon comes in. How amazing! You finished a marathon! Not many people can do that! Well actually they can and do, but it seems an amazing accomplishment to me of will and body. And so after two years of piddling, I am getting serious and going for the 26.2. You wouldn't believe the time and effort involved in running religiously. I don't even feel that devoted yet. Luckily I have other zealots, who have given up so much of their time to run with me. Another thing I have to thank running for: my amazing friendships.
So with this inaugural post, I am going to make some promises. Stick to my running schedule, shave 2.5 mins off my mile, and stop using my work schedule (I am a Labor and Delivery nurse) as an excellent excuse not to run.
- Music:The Red Violin Soundtrack